Wednesday, December 2, 2009

midnight buffet

My friends have no idea how much better position they are than to me.
God I don't understand the message you're trying to teach me.
I don't understand why I feel like the sore thumb...again.
I can't begin to express.
I feel like I try hard.
Dad says God will sees my hard ethic.
Jesus came to this world poor, without status, without looks, without anything but trust in God that everything through Him will be provided.
..not in my particular situation I guess.
After failure after failure, how am I to continue to walk?
With all the weight of the world on his shoulders..the weight of sin
while people were cursing at him, even those he might have healed, how did he look upon them with mercy and forgiveness? He KNEW they didn't know any better.
What is with the human race how we tend to believe we know where we are in the world, as to what our functions are? We seek things to stability. But God tells us as Christians, our lives will forever be unstable.
How did he walk to his crucifixion?
Ultimately, God is the ruler of this world.

Forgive me Lord for I am still young and learning about you and myself in this world.
You continue to break me. For that I should be thankful.
It's tough to be here.
Occasionally, more often lately..I feel like a 4 year old in the dark, in the rain, not knowing where I am and where I should go. I feel no one understand me or will understand me as much as you will. I have to learn to be patient with myself first.
Lord give me strength.

No comments:

Post a Comment